Saturday, April 14, 2012

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, STELLA!

The most amazing moment of my life - hands down.
Our gorgeous four-year-old!


I can't believe it was four years ago today that I met the love of my life.

And this might sound corny, but I honestly love this kid more and more each day. This age - four - is just so perfect. She's funny, she's smart, she can communicate her needs, rather than screaming and crying and hoping I get the point. She sleeps. She snuggles. She REQUESTS hugs and kisses (rather than acting like they're a burden). She has a best friend and is a social butterfly.

How far we've come. How much we've changed. And it's all been for the better.

Stella Rae, four years ago today I was consumed with fear. Fear that you'd get hurt on my watch, fear that I couldn't cut it as a mom, fear of breastfeeding and night wakings and that the flashbacks from the pain of natural labor would haunt me to my grave. All of those fears seem silly now, replaced by the much bigger fears of child predators, random violence, kidnappings, and decades of therapy bills where you complain about my imperfections.

Four years ago I was consumed by love. That has only grown. Grown and grown and grown. I look at you and your beauty HURTS. How did someone so lovely, inside and out, come from my body? It's a mystery and a miracle.

I hope I can be the mom you deserve. And I hope age four is your best year yet. Thanks for making my life more rich and meaningful than I knew it could be! Happy birthday, darling!